Both of my children are questioners. They start the first thing in the morning and don’t let up until they go to sleep. Both, in fact, have been known to lie in bed and ask many a question to themselves, their stuffies, the air… all overheard on the monitor long after we have left them for sleep. They know that these questions are not going to be answered right then, but feel the need to get them out anyways. We frequently get asked the questions in person the next morning. I love that they are both so curious, and hope that I never tire of answering their questions.

Woo is a master questioner. He has never asked just “why”. Since he started talking, the questions have been very specific, pointed, and non-stop. Our wonderful daycare provider frequently tells me that he asks more questions than the other four children combined! This may be because the others can’t get a word in edgewise, but any way you look at it, there are a tonne of questions.

Our answers frequently always lead to more questions, and more questions, and the discussions either end with me turning the question back on him (ie “why do you think that is happening”) or promising to go ask the internet what the answer to that question is. I do have to go to the internet a lot to find out the right answers for him, which makes me think that school will be a learning experience for us all.

Tonight at dinner Woo asked us if it was less dangerous to get smoke only in your ears. We both sat in silence for a few minutes, not sure where this was coming or going, and then talked about how it would likely be less dangerous to get smoke in your ears, that it would be hard to only get smoke in your ears, and that the fact that smoke was getting in your ears meant you were close to fire, so eyes/nose/mouth would be in danger too. He didn’t seem satisfied with our answers, but dropped the line of questions.

It was my turn to put Woo to bed tonight, and he was very deliberate in his choice for books, one of his favourite Sesame Street books. He chose this book because we clearly had not answered his questions at supper, and he knew that the story would let me see where he was coming from. I didn’t know that yet. I started reading, but didn’t think anything of his book choice, or determination to have it read, until I saw this picture:

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One of the things that we have tried to foster in our children is a positive self image and a healthy dose of self confidence.  Most days I think that we are doing a decent job.  Neither of them is what I would call overconfident, they know their limits, and they aren’t cocky. We know they are young and things could change, so watch them to see how they develop.

It seems of late that Woo has become aware of how he can sway opinions and get his way if he projects confidence.  I noticed it at first with Goosie.  He can get her to do or say anything, so long as he is confident in his delivery.  He delights in getting her to be naughty, knowing full well that she will get in trouble for her misdeeds!  It only took me half a dozen or so such misdeeds to realize that they were immediately preceded by Woo saying “Goose, do this…”.

Now that he gets in trouble for leading her astray, he has focussed his attention on getting her to back up his rich fantasies.  I frequently get these awesome tales about the completely implausible things that he they saw or did.  His latest is that he sees eagles everywhere.  Not just birds that he thinks are eagles, imaginary eagles.  Each sighting is described to me in detail, and verified by Goose.  “It landed in the back yard, RIGHT Goose?!” or “It flew by our window and looked in, RIGHT Goose?!”.  She blindly agrees, regardless of whether she was looking in the right direction, or even in the room with him.

At first I passed this off with a little bit of hero worship from a little sister to big brother, until I started to notice that he’s doing it to others too.  Last night Willy came downstairs and told me that Woo was having a quiet time before he slept.  I knew that this should not be so as woo had not had a nap yesterday, and usually face plants at 7:00pm on “no nap” days, but Willy he reported that Woo insisted he was not tired and told him so.  Fast forward twenty minutes and Woo is melting down because he so tired, and I am wondering how he ever convinced Willy, who is pretty good at detecting tiredness, that he wasn’t.  It’s not the first time that he has gotten his way with Willy in this manner.  He also does it to his babysitter, who he regularly gets to let him do crazy things, or have special treats by saying, with authority, “My mom lets me…” I keep telling them and myself that he is only four!  What happens when he starts to work it on me?!

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We buy a lot of secondhand everything for the littles. Usually what happens is I bring the stuff home and sort it. Stuff that can be used now gets put into circulation, and anything that is too big or to be saved for a gift is packed away and stored. I bought one of these items shortly after Woo was born. It was a little tool box that was filled with play doh toys, or so I thought. It was tied together and I trusted that was what was inside. Woo was about six months old at the time, so I packed it away until he was old enough.

Fast forward two and a half years, his third birthday is approaching. So I go and get this little box and opened it up just to clean it out. I really wanted to make sure that there were no old hard old play doh bits inside and, and that no toys that were too sharp or not really pay doh toys. I then wrapped it up and we gave it to him at his party. He loved it and played with it pretty much nonstop for several weeks after he got it. It still gets dragged out on a fairly regular basis, and he and Goose now play with it together. We’ve never had to add anything to it, the toys inside were perfect for their play doh play. It really is one of my best consignment finds!

One of the toys inside was this little tree…

It’s really not a great play doh toy as there is not much that you can do with it. The lils seem to play with it often enough, but it is pretty much an accessory to their other creations. We really thought nothing on it until one day Willy held it up like this:

Then took it apart and I really looked at it…

We’re dirty birds, so we laughed and laughed, and then laughed some more. We are now thinking that maybe it should have been taken out of the tool box on that initial cull. Of course it never fails that either Goose or Woo go looking for the “tree” whenever the box gets brought out, and as they play, it never gets assembled anymore.

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In the last week or so I started noticing some chatter on Twitter about being a “zombie mom”. I have been there and remember it well, that haze that surrounds a new parent, where sleep is a luxery that most can’t afford. It was a time when I did some really silly things, like left the water running for long periods of time, pouring hot coffee in a mug with a tea bag, then serving it to Willy as just a normal cup of tea, leaving the laundry wet in the washer for days… It was worse with Goose, as I had Woo to keep up to in the daylight, and never got to nap. Woo gave up napping three days after Goose came home from the hospital. The days were looooong.

As I read some of these tweets from these new moms, I felt sorry for them, but was secretly smug.  Smug because I am so far past that stage.  My lils, for the most part, are great overnight sleepers. If they wake in the night, they are quick to settle and we barely notice.  Willy is always the first to get to them anyway, so I get the shut-eye that I need. If I don’t it is my fault for going to bed too late. Then Willy went away and Goose got croup.  I hate croup.  It not only sounds horrible, but it destroys the sleep of whichever little is currently afflicted.  Who could sleep through that awful cough?  I can’t, and I am not the one making all that racket.  We have become pros at taking all the precautions we can and managing it at home so that we don’t have to go to the doctor or hospital, but every now and again they get a bad case.  Goose has a bad case.

The first night was not too bad as she only woke twice so my tired was a manageable tired. The second night was way worse, and she woke at least once per hour.  Then the thunderstorm hit and I was finished sleeping for the night.  I lay in bed and started thinking of my day. Worried that I would fall back to sleep and wake late, I started jotting down important things that I was worried I’d forget.  Things like get file from office, pack a lunch, get dressed, bring camera… … get dressed.  I had to remind myself to GET DRESSED for work. It took two short days, and I am a Zombie Mom again.  I am afraid of what will happen next.

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I like to joke around about my mother-in-law as much as the next person, but for the most part, she’s pretty awesome. Take this week for example… Willy’s away, so she dropped everything and hopped on the train to come and help out and talk care of the lils while I go to work. The fact that the monkeys are sick has not deterred her, even though it has meant that she is now exposed to their little germs and at risk of getting sick, despite the fact that she is hosting a party when she returns home at the end of the week. It has also meant she has not been able to meet with friends here, as the lils won’t be going to daycare tomorrow. That earns her a BUNCH of gold stars in my book!

This visit is starting to be a bit of a problem for me, as she is starting to make me look bad. At first I didn’t see it for the clearly calculated plot that it must be. Seems innocent enough that she planned her train arrival at a time that was most convenient for the lils and I to pick her up on friday, right? I mean, she didn’t intentionally take the perfect train that allowed her grandchildren to stand on the platform and be awed by the arrival of the train, then be greeted by her running down the platform with open arms to them? They were thrilled. I didn’t see it when we got home and she suggested to them that they all paint together. In the house. Every day of her visit. I started to get suspicious when I caught her reading them book after book after book, including the same books over and over without complaint.

I came home from work today to tales of a game of “doctor” that somehow involved the lils piling every blanket and chair cushion in the play room onto Gramma and then jumping up and down on her repeatedly. Then I heard that they had hot crossed buns at both morning and afternoon snack today, complete with hot chocolate this aft. I knew what was up when she let Goose climb into her lap this evening and happily much on her dinner cuddled in her Gramma’s arms. How on earth are am I supposed to live up to this??

Now she has done it. She is making me look bad to myself. This weekend, she raked our lawns and cleaned up my flower gardens. Today I came home to reports of happy children, with nary a whine or cry in sight. One night, she offered to make supper, and when I shoed her out of the kitchen, she started to fold and sort the laundry, on the same day that it was washed. As each load finished!! Each night after supper, she has sent me out of the kitchen to play with the lils while she washes the dishes. On the same day that they were used!! Then, right before bed, she cleans up the play room, sorting all of the toys, and getting the lils to actually help.

It has gotten to the point where I now have to privately make things up that she has done wrong so that I can live with these standards. Sure, she folds the laundry, but the underwear is folded wrong. Yes, she sweeps the floors, but she walked by that pile of clothes at the top of the stairs twice, and everybody knows that things left at the top of the stairs are supposed to go down. It’s wrong to just walk by. After the dishes, she leaves the water in the bottom of the sink, claiming that she is looking for more dishes to wash, but that is just wrong. Thank goodness I have these to “faults” to hold on to.

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I have never been the type of parent who lamented the fact that my children were growing and changing. I was never sad to see them move into the next size of clothing, didn’t wish that they would stay dependent for a little bit longer, and was actually quite relieved when they started walking. Each stage was great while it happened, (except maybe teething and the “I don’t need to nap” stages, I could not wait to move past them) but the end just meant that a new adventure was beginning, and I’ve loved each one.

This has changed recently. All of a sudden I am aware that time is passing at an alarming rate, and in five short months, Woo will be starting school and everything will change. We won’t have our days together with Goose, he won’t have his most awesome daycare provider three days a week, we won’t be able to go on so many adventures, and he’ll be separated from us… This makes me a little sad. There is nothing I want more than to make time stand still now, so that we can live every second together to the fullest. As much as I am excited about this school thing that he will be doing, I wish it wasn’t so soon.

The neat thing is, in trying to hold on to this time, I find that we are doing all sorts of fun things together that I am not sure we would have if before. Goose, Woo and I are more relaxed, do more together and have a tonne of laughs and good times. It’s easy to think that you can do something or play somewhere another day when those days are limitless. For the first time in either of their lives, there is a hard date when something is going to change. That has put a little bit of pressure on us, on me. The results have been great for us.  Maybe there is something to be said for holding on.

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