15
November

Practice

Woo knows how to write his letters, but he prefers not to. If he is in the mood, he will write his name, and maybe the initials of everyone else in the house, but it generally takes some coaching. He would much rather read letters in his books than write them. Now that he is in school, one of the things he is expected to work on are his letters, upper and lowercase. When school started, we told his teachers of his preferences, but trusted that they would encourage him in their own way. It seems that letters ARE much more interesting at school, and he appears to be doing well in writing.

We weren’t quite sure how well he was doing until Sunday morning, when he was left to his own devices while we slept. The lils have been waking really early each morning. Some days they drag one of us to their beds, some days they crawl into our bed, but most days they just play with each other. On this particular Sunday, Goose was snuggled between us, and I thought that Woo was in his room, reading a book.

I thought I stayed awake, but woke to the sound of excited and happy chatter about their new bean bag chairs, which had been purchased the day before. They chose their own, and both seemed to be in love with them. The first snippet of their conversation that I clearly remember hearing  was Woo saying “So now we won’t get them confused, because our names are on them!” Sure enough, they were.  The letters were perfectly formed, and the printing was very neat.  Guess all that practice is paying off.

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8
November

Time in class

I want to be a teacher in Bangalore! Specifically a teacher at the lils school. The weather is great, the classes are small, the children seem to be pretty happy and well behaved, and their are no snowsuits to fight with. The biggest clothing change that they have to deal with is the change into swimsuits a couple of times a week. Wet bathing suits can be tricky, but the children are swimming, which makes the vast majority of them very happy! The best part of being a teacher in my lils school has to be getting to teach Woo and Goose. Not enough? Think about the holidays.

Today marked the first day that the lils have been to school in over two weeks. We arrived here, they attended the first week of classes, a full week, and then went on break for Diwali. A break that lasted over two weeks. Diwali is a Holiday in India, and the rest of the country gets one, two, or three days, I am told. The lils’ school got two weeks, plus a day. Next week, and the week that follows are each shortened by a day, then a couple of full weeks and we are into three weeks for Christmas… It goes on.

I realize that not all of these days and weeks are strict holidays, and that the teachers are actually working during that some of that time, but for much of it they are not working. I also don’t know if these are paid holidays, but when you total up the time that they are not in the classroom over the course of the year, it is twenty weeks! That is a pretty impressive amount of time out of the classroom!

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6
November

It starts with a hug

This move hasn’t been all roses, and it’s shown in more ways than one. We have each had our adjustments to make, and some have taken a while. Sadly for me, I have not been adjusting as well as I hoped, and that makes it hard for interacting with the lils, who are trying to figure it out as well and acting out of character a fair bit. Throw in the fact that we have been stuck in the house together for hours at a time waiting for various deliveries etc has made it worse. As a result, I lose my patience, give many timeouts, over react, yell, and have A LOT of regrets and apologies. I know that this is ME not them, and I know that I need to figure it out fast.

Last week Candace posted a mom challenge on her blog. It was a list of thirty things that she was going to do, one a day, over the month of November. Actions that brought the focus back to her children and asked that she take the time to appreciate them. I was excited and thankful that she posted it. It was so simply laid out, and clearly what I needed. It also told me that I wasn’t the only mom who needed a little reminder. Pretty much all of the items on the list are easy and should be no brainers, but for me of late, they haven’t been.

The easiest so far (keeping in mind that we are six days in) has been the suggestion to hug each child at least three times. We are pretty huggy people, so I had this one in the bag by 7:30am. I decided to just keep hugging, and not just when they wanted a hug, or were hurt or sad, but when ever. There were many, many hugs dished out that day, and in the days that followed. The best part is that they have started initiating the hugs at a rate greater than what I am doing. Big, squeeze as tight as you can, hold on for a long time hugs. It’s a big ol love fest here.

While I knew that this challenge was the right thing for me, I had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I was planning to follow a list that told me how I could be more present as a parent, more understanding of my lils. Six days in, I have made many really small adjustments, some on the list, some not. I know that there is more to do, and will keep trying. Seeing the changes that have been the result, in all of our moods and behaviours, has told me that it doesn’t matter how I got the reminder, just that I knew I needed it. It’s more than just the hugs, but they are my favourite part.

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